-
I’m Moving!
I’ve started writing over at Substack – check it out! You can subscribe to my newsletters for free. I’ll still be here at Come Alive, but I am going to be shifting and changing the focus of this website as I have time and ability. Stay tuned for more info on my upcoming prayer journal, Hidden Holiness!
-
First Sunday of Advent: Bearing Life into the World
Nine months pregnant. Aching back and feet. Exhaustion. And on top of it, traveling by donkey for three whole days in order to fulfill a command from a far-off governor to count the inhabitants of Bethlehem. Yet – Mary never claimed exemption because of her circumstances. I probably would have tried to claim exemption. I have claimed an exemption for jury duty for much less than three days on a donkey at my due date. Why didn’t she refuse to go or claim an exemption? Why didn’t she make it easier for herself? Caryll Houselander puts it in hauntingly simple terms: “...Mary never claimed exemption from the common lot, from…
-
Advent Emptiness
I decided that for Advent this year I would read The Reed of God by Caryll Houselander. It’s a book I’ve attempted before without success. As I perused the first chapter, I realized this is what I need. And as I read through the first chapter entitled “emptiness,” I realized how perfectly it makes for a pre-Advent examination of our hearts. Please join me as I share some reflections as we prepare to enter into a new church year and the penitential season of Advent. In the coming weeks I hope you continue with me in my walk through The Reed of God. If we are to receive fully from the…
-
Lessons from the Garden: Patience
In the dead of winter, the idea of planning a new little cut flower garden was a bright spot. A meager 4ft x 8ft garden bed was full of possibilities. Can we actually make dahlias grow and flourish? They have a reputation for being finicky. Should we start our zinnias from seeds inside? Where should I get unique varieties of the cosmos I want to grow? The possibilities are endless. In mid-March we started our seeds in a corner of the basement, complete with a seedling tray, grow light and heat mat. It all went well, and seedling deaths were kept to a minimum. The preparation that goes along with…
-
How to Begin Again: Lessons from Nature (and Lent)
The doldrums of Lent are upon us. Several weeks of slogging through, haphazardly trying to fulfill commitments of prayer, fasting, and almsgiving, sometimes doing them well and sometimes not doing them at all. But everything worth doing is worth doing, even poorly, right? Even in the midst of Winter’s Last Stand, (read: winter’s last shot at causing nasty viruses that knock whole families on their feet, keep small babies up at night with congested noses and keep preschoolers down all day, bound to the sofa with a fever) we must try to slog through, even if it’s poorly. Because as most people know it’s hard to keep commitments and fast…
-
5 Things I Learned in 5 Years of Parenting
I cannot believe my baby girl is turning 5 this week! It feels like just yesterday I was experiencing parenthood for the first time, from morning sickness, to childbirth, to toddler tantrums. I can’t say whether the last five years have flown by or lasted forever. Maybe that old adage is true “the days are long but the years are short.” But in these past five years, I’ve learned so much about myself, marriage, and parenthood. Some are things I heard my own parents say but couldn’t appreciate until I lived the experiences myself, some are things I’ve learned on my own, while some are silly and others are profound.…
-
May You Find the Light in the Darkness
We found ourselves in the emergency room with our six week old. Our house was yet another casualty of RSV this season, and despite our best efforts to protect our six week old from it, we found ourselves rushing him to the hospital because we were concerned by his breathing that night. After getting him evaluated, he was given oxygen and his body found some rest and relief. And they wanted to admit him. An outcome I honestly wasn’t expecting when we took him in. As we sat in our dimmed room waiting for a hospital bed to be prepared for us, I contemplated the darkness of that moment. The…
-
Learning to Surrender (The Sequel)
If you haven’t read Learning to Surrender, that’s part one of this story, so be sure to read that first. The week after learning baby was breech, I headed into the hospital for my version. I was pretty certain baby had already flipped back to head down, but I went to the hospital and asked for a quick ultrasound before they tried to place an IV. When they put the wand on my belly, it was very clear that baby was already head down. I was thrilled! All the pieces were in place to have a vaginal delivery, just a waiting game at this point. Jesus, you took care of…
-
Learning to Surrender
Who likes to be in control? To plan? To know the next steps? Or at least choose those next steps? I do! But life has a tendency to get in the way. It feels like so often we are thrown into unwelcome circumstances and situations that we would never have chosen for ourselves. Back in February we found out we were expecting again. Happy news, certainly. After having had a miscarriage in the past, it always comes with certain levels of fear and anxiety. Around eight weeks pregnant, feeling sick as ever, I was able to go on a unique retreat. It was a beautiful and peaceful (and deeply nauseating)…
-
The World is Thy Ship and Not Thy Home
After college, I moved to a new city with a new job and a new car. I didn’t know too many people, but I made good friends and found new roommates. The trouble was each time I found a new roommate, they would inevitably get engaged soon after and usually after about a year of living together, they’d move out and get married. Thus forcing me to repeat the process of finding a new roommate and/or a new place to live. I wasn’t in a financial position to afford rent without someone to split it with. I longed deeply for stability and permanence, and, quite frankly, to find my vocation.…