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Living Hope.
“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who in his great mercy gave us a new birth to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you…” 1 Peter 1:3-4 I have grappled long and hard with hope. What is it, really? How do I hope? Why do I even need to hope? Last year felt hopeless and difficult. I felt like my prayers were useless. My sentiment was generally “Why do I even pray if I’m not going to get what I so deeply desire?” In my heart,…
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Beauty from the Ashes
This time last year I was reeling from a miscarriage, still actively grieving. I was also struggling to come to terms with the loss of my job in youth ministry. Lent felt very much like the desert last year. Time can be a beautiful thing though. It offers some distance, healing, and much needed perspective. Standing here, a full year later offers many glimmers of hope and beauty. I have settled into the rhythm of being a stay at home mom with Lucy, who truly is a light. And now we are expecting again, after nearly a year of trying. Beauty from the ashes. But then life throws a wrench…
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When Prayer Doesn’t Work
Before you begin, read Mark 5:21-43 I have been thinking about prayer a lot lately. Not necessarily how do I pray or what should I pray, but rather what is prayer, really? How does prayer work? Why doesn’t prayer work better? I mean, let’s be honest, I feel like most people (myself included) have wondered why God isn’t answering their prayers. Now, this is such an incredibly broad topic I won’t be able to talk about it from every aspect. So today, I’m addressing the “big” stuff. Why did I have a miscarriage even though I lifted up desperate, incessant prayers that it wouldn’t happen? Why did my daughter/son/mother/father not recover…
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O, Death, Where is Thy Sting?
When I was in college, noon mass on Fridays was typically celebrated by Fr. James Albers (now Abbot). At the end of mass, we would always sing The Ultima, a Benedictine prayer asking Mary to intercede for us that we may have a happy death. Fr. James would always remind us to keep death before our eyes, not in a morbid sense, but to remember the hope and glory before us in eternal life with Jesus. Those words have been on my mind a lot lately. Do you keep death before your eyes? Do you keep the end in mind, that you may not forget the goal of this earthly…